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by Arit Amana

通过阿里特·阿马纳(Arit Amana)

拒绝的祝福(或超越“否”) (The Blessing of Rejection (or Growing Past the “No”))

I feel almost guilty to admit that it’s taken me just shy of 3 weeks to write this post. If you’ve followed my developer journey so far, you’ve read about my coding challenges and triumphs, the safety I’ve felt from committed, compassionate mentorship, and the lessons I’ve learned from teamwork.

承认我花了不到三周的时间写这篇文章，我感到几乎内gui。 如果到目前为止，您已经了解了我的开发人员之旅，那么您将了解到我在编码方面的挑战和成就 ，从坚定而富有同情心的指导中获得的安全感以及从团队合作中学到的经验教训。

All those stories emanated from the secure cocoon of being a coding bootcamper. Since graduating, I’ve now begun to experience the big wide world of job hunting, where I’m gingerly testing my developer wings barely dry from my 6-month Firehose Project tenure.

所有这些故事都源于成为编码训练营的安全茧。 自毕业以来，我现在已经开始体验广阔的求职世界，在这里，我认真地测试了我在为期6个月的Firehose Project任期内几乎不干的开发商机翼。

I’ve wrestled with whether and how to continue documenting my journey. A part of me wishes that my glass-slipper-fits “you’re hired!” moment would happen almost immediately, so that I could write a glowing story of how I went from emailing my resume out, to sitting at my new work desk in record time and with minimal effort. With an embarrassed smile, I realize how validated and “authentic” such an outcome would make me feel.

我一直在努力是否以及如何继续记录我的旅程。 我的一部分希望我的玻璃拖鞋适合“您已被雇用！” 那一刻几乎会立即发生，所以我可以写下一个光辉的故事，说明我从发电子邮件发送简历到如何在创纪录的时间里以最少的精力坐在新的办公桌上。 带着尴尬的笑容，我意识到这种结果的真实性和“真实性”会让我感到。

I juggle phone screens, lengthy email threads, personal dev projects, open-source contributions, algorithm practice and further education, determined to present my best self to that hiring manager appointed to extend my first pro dev opportunity.

我努力处理电话屏幕，冗长的电子邮件线程，个人开发项目，开源贡献，算法实践和继续教育，决心将我最好的自我介绍给被任命来扩大我的第一个专业开发机会的招聘经理。

I thought that moment had arrived when I had my first onsite interview about 2 weeks ago. According to the hiring manager, I did better on the first-round coding exercise than some senior applicants — a revelation that sent warm ripples of pride through my being.

我以为大约两周前我第一次接受现场采访的时候到了。 根据招聘经理的说法，我在第一轮编码练习中比一些高级应聘者做得更好-一个启示使我的存在激起了自豪感。

The next round was an hour-long conversation with one of the company’s founders, during which I expressed genuine interest in the company’s purpose and goals, and they further elaborated on company culture and priorities.

下回合与公司的一位创始人进行了长达一个小时的对话，在此期间我表达了对公司宗旨和目标的真正兴趣，他们进一步阐述了公司的文化和优先事项。

When I received the email inviting me to the final-round, 3-hour onsite interview, my stomach twisted into knots reinforced by nerves a-haywire.

当我收到邀请我参加最后一轮，为时3小时的现场采访的电子邮件时，我的肚子扭成一团，被一根干草捆扎的神经所强化。

What will they ask me? How intense will the white-boarding session be? Will I freeze? Will I crash?

他们会问我什么？ 白板会议将有多激烈？ 我会冻结吗？ 我会崩溃吗？

他们会雇用我吗？ (Will they hire me?)

The interview ended up being much more pleasant than I anticipated. The developer who led our panel discussion did an incredible job of setting me at ease. I found myself enjoying their questions, which were quite holistic and sought to get an all-round sense of who I was — emotionally, relationally, and professionally.

采访最终比我预期的愉快得多。 主持小组讨论的开发人员在让我放心方面做得非常出色。 我发现自己很喜欢他们的问题，这些问题非常全面，并试图从情感，关系和专业上全面了解我是谁。

The technical exercises were unpressured and collaborative. I wasn't thrown to the piranhas and expected to prevail without a nick. I emerged from the interview feeling quite confident, 65–70% sure that I’d be extended an offer.

技术练习不受压力且需要协作。 我并没有被扔到食人鱼上，并希望自己能胜任一切。 我从面试中脱颖而出，感到非常自信，有65–70％的人确定我会继续接受报价。

So when I got the rejection email — it was quite kind, detailed and explanatory — it knocked much of the wind out of me. I experienced several emotions, which I want to distill in the rest of this piece.

因此，当我收到拒绝电子邮件时-这是非常友好，详细和说明性的邮件-令我大吃一惊。 我经历了几种情感，我想在本文的其余部分中提炼出来。

Why? Well, an article like this would have encouraged me a lot that day, and I would like to help other devs with similar stories give voice to their experience.

为什么？ 好吧，那天这样的文章会给我很大的鼓舞，我想帮助其他有类似故事的开发者表达他们的经验。

耻辱 (Shame)

All my family, friends and mentors knew about my onsite interview. They had listened with bated breath as I replayed the questions and my answers, and each had prophesied my impending employment. So, yes, it was hard to answer their “Did you hear back yet?” phone calls with the unwelcome news.

我的家人，朋友和导师都知道我的现场采访。 当我重播问题和答案时，他们屏住呼吸，每个人都预言了我即将到来的工作。 因此，是的，很难回答他们的“您是否还听到了吗？” 不受欢迎的新闻。

It was even harder to hear the thinly-veiled disappointment for (not in) me in their don’t-worry and you-got-this phrases. It’s a primal need that we humans share: the need to be validated. To be authenticated. To be wanted and to be valued.

在他们的“不用担心”和“你懂了”这句话时，很难听到对我(不是在我身上)面无表情的失望。 这是我们人类共同的首要需求：需要验证的需求。 待认证。 被通缉和被重视。

It was all too easy for me to interpret not getting the position as an indictment on my ability — innate or learned — to be a software developer. Which led to…

对于我来说，很容易将没有得到该职位解释为对我成为软件开发人员的能力的一种天赋或天赋。 导致...

自我怀疑 (Self-doubt)

This emotion dragged on longer than I would have admitted, were I not writing this quite transparent piece. All the knowledge gains and leaps I had experienced during my bootcamp now seemed so paltry and insignificant.

如果我不写这篇相当透明的文章，这种情绪拖延的时间会比我想的要长。 现在，我在训练营中经历的所有知识收获和飞跃显得微不足道且微不足道。

“You’re not enough… you don’t know enough… you can’t learn fast and deep enough… you won’t ever know enough…” the refrain was unrelenting. Sometimes it was muted as I busied myself with projects and chores, always loudest as I snuggled into bed for the night.

“你还不够……你还不够了解……你不能学得足够快又不够深入……你永远也不够了解……”这句话是毫不留情的。 有时候，当我忙于自己的项目和琐事时，它会被静音，当我整夜躺在床上时，声音总是最大的。

My self-doubt had the potential of literally turning me back from my dreams, of causing me to extinguish the flame of purpose and faith that had spurred me past ever-competing priorities to my present position.

我的自我怀疑有可能使我从梦想中退缩，使我消灭目的和信念的火焰，这使我摆脱了以往竞争激烈的优先职位。

As I considered all that I had sacrificed and overcome to complete my bootcamp, I started using my voice. When a self-defeating thought penetrated my mind, I would articulate it out loud then add “… and, Arit, you are wrong”.

当我考虑为了完成我的训练营而做出的所有牺牲和克服时，我开始使用自己的声音。 当一个自欺欺人的念头渗入我的脑海时，我会大声说出来，然后加上“……而且，阿里特，你错了” 。

I reminded myself of every professional developer who gave me candid feedback during my learning, realizing that their judgment and assessment of me was trustworthy and sound. I rose, mentally, above my self-doubt, not trying to kill or silence it, but choosing to speak louder and more firmly than it did.

我使自己想起了每一个专业的开发人员，他们在学习过程中给我坦诚的反馈，意识到他们对我的判断和评估是值得信赖和健全的。 我在精神上超越了自我怀疑，没有试图杀死它或使它沉默，而是选择比它更大声，更坚定地说话。

内省 (Introspection)

This was my segue to taking charge of my job-rejection experience. I went back to that email and analyzed it critically, realizing that avoiding it only granted it greater stinging power. All elevations — from the backyard hill to Everest — are scalable once we choose to view them as obstacles and not hindrances.

这是我负责领导我的弃职经历的选择。 我回到那封电子邮件并对它进行了严格的分析，意识到避免它只会赋予它更大的刺痛力。 一旦我们选择将它们视为障碍而不是障碍，那么从后院丘陵到珠穆朗玛峰的所有海拔高度都是可扩展的。

I took note of the strengths and weaknesses the interviewers identified in my presentation, and used them to adjust my job-hunting strategy moving forward. For example, when talking with hiring managers or senior devs, I’ve decided to broach the subject of just how supportive of new devs their job environment is— upfront and candidly.

我注意到面试官在我的演讲中指出的优缺点，并利用它们来调整我的求职策略。 例如，当与招聘经理或高级开发人员交谈时，我决定探讨一下他们的工作环境对新开发人员的支持程度如何的问题–坦率而坦率。

I also realized that the email’s level of detail was not typical of most rejection notices, and I became grateful for such feedback.

我还意识到，电子邮件的详细程度并不是大多数拒绝通知书所代表的，我对此表示感谢。

希望 (Hope)

“I’m after my one ‘YES’… five yes’s would be nice, but not necessary…” Once I allowed the observations of my interviewers run through me, and I received them as feedback on my professional profile and not my intrinsic value, I began to hope again.

“我追求我的“是”…很不错，但没有必要……”一旦我允许我的面试官的观察贯穿我，然后我就收到了他们的意见，这是对我的职业概况 而非内在价值的反馈，我又开始希望。

This experience has made me less afraid of being transparent and vulnerable in my job search. I have reasserted my skills and abilities with confidence and boldness. I’ve devised non-traditional strategies for getting hiring managers, company owners and influential employees to notice me and grant me a conversation.

这种经历使我在求职过程中不惧怕透明和脆弱。 我充满自信和果敢地重申了自己的技能和能力。 我设计了非传统的策略来使招聘经理，公司所有者和有影响力的员工注意到我并进行交谈。

I have embraced my known unknowns with humility and a greater desire to locate that dev team that will catalyze my growth as a developer with enthusiasm and support.

我谦虚地拥抱了我的未知领域，并渴望找到一个开发团队，这将激发我作为一名开发人员的热情和支持。

There is a certain randomness to the job-search process, but there is nothing haphazard about my intention of making significant contributions to this world as a developer.

求职过程存在一定的随机性，但是我为开发人员这个世界做出重大贡献的意图绝非偶然。

翻译自: https://www.freecodecamp.org/news/the-blessing-of-rejection-or-growing-past-the-no-d492795e3327/

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